Powerball jackpot


We all know **Winners do not use drugs**, but **college-age highly stressed individuals might**. So imagine you are a *Highly skilled* ***Professional Gamer***. You need to perform to the highest level of play day in and day out. But you are going to be traveling around the world a whole bunch meaning you can’t rely on your local LA-based ~~Dealer~~ Pharmacist and licensed Doctor.

What do you do? you try to find one in each city you have to visit of course. But some cities don’t have that big of a college population, so finding a dude there might be harder. But to know how hard it is to find a dealer we first need to know how many people are using Adderall, myself not included.

Some hastily researched [articles](https://www.michigandaily.com/section/research/adderall-used-24-university-students) report that around 25% of the general college population is getting mad focused on their studies. This means that of say 100 students we can expect 25 to know how to our hands on some of those pills. So the *six degrees of separations* says to me that I can simplify this by doing some hand-wavy stuff and saying that for every 100 students we got a single provider.

Now for the number-crunching:

* How many students are there in every homestand location.
* Our dealer count is gonna get divided by 100,000 to take into account the chance of running into one in game day.
* Then we just need to find the team that has the highest chance to score high based on where they play.

Here we have the power rakings based purely on each of the team’s home city. But of course, they are going on the road for a lot of their games, so we need to dig deeper.

> **EDIT: A couple of people felt Boston was too low and that my methods were crude and unscientific. to those people I say ~~frigg off hoser~~ I have done extended research and recalculated their count. and to the surprise of no one, not even all the Adderall in the world can help Boston escape the bottom of the standings.**

> **EDIT2: It has come to my attention that Adderall is illegal in France. But according to the french ancient text, aka *the law* you can import enough for personal use as long as you got a legit permit. We sure do right guys? So what we are doing is replacing the homestand value of the homestand just before a Paris homestand to calculate chance. I am not a Statistics mayor I know this is not how this works but I do not care.**

> **EDIT3: For some unknowable reason Boston’s fans rather be known druggies than face the reality that their team is hot trash. So they have provided me with clear criticisms of my methods that, and I am not joking here, amount to saying “We are more hardcore than you give us credit for”. So to somehow *amend* this situation I have replicated the research in two ways. The first is recalculating once more every college enrollment in the *Bostom metropolitan area*. The second is applying an index modifier for all the teams based on the [List of countries by prevalence of opiates use](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_prevalence_of_opiates_use). This is basically a nerf to the Chinese teams and a… *buff* the American ones… I will eave the previous one up but also include the new table below.**

City | Students | Dealer Count | Chance of dealer
————————————————————————-|—————————————————————————–|———————————————————————————|————————————————————————————-
Shanghai | 1454400 | 14544 | 14.54%
Guangzhou | 766800 | 7668 | 7.67%
Chengdu | 468000 | 4680 | 4.68%
Seoul | 434222 | 4342 | 4.34%
London | 400000 | 4000 | 4.00%
Atlanta | 363902 | 3639 | 3.64%
Paris | 330000 | 3300 | Sad emoji
LA Gladiators | 190832 | 1908 | 1.91%
LA Valiant | 190832 | 1908 | 1.91%
Dallas | 179599 | 1796 | 1.80%
Toronto | 146894 | 1469 | 1.47%
Philadelphia | 129154 | 1292 | 1.29%
Florida | 119017 | 1190 | 1.19%
Boston | 116339 | 1163 | 1.16%
Hangzhou | 100000 | 1000 | 1.00%
Houston | 83712 | 837 | 0.84%
New York | 68943 | 689 | 0.69%
San Francisco | 62589 | 626 | 0.63%
Vancouver | 56778 | 568 | 0.57%
Washington | 49266 | 493 | 0.49%

I searched through the old googlephone to find the general college population of each city. Some places ranked way lower and I suspect it is because ~~they suck, they have fewer institutions, google broke,~~ I was lazy.

This is our final power ranking! By taking into account each homestand we can use the median chance to run into a friendly dealer as our ranker. Of course, we could use other systems, but we have little time for that here.

Team Playing | Homestand | Percentage| Chance| Of | Finding | A| Chill | And | Legit | Dealer | Right | There | Sitting | Outside | The | Arena | My | Dude | . | Median Chance overall | Average Chance overall | Chance per game
—|—|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|———|—-
Shanghai | 14.54% | 7.67% | 1.00% | 7.67% | 7.67% | 1.91% | 1.80% | 4.34% | 0.49% | 1.29% | 3.64% | 1.00% | 7.67% | 14.54% | 4.68% | 4.68% | | | | 4.51% | 5.29% | 3.02%
Chengdu | 14.54% | 7.67% | 1.00% | 4.34% | 7.67% | 7.67% | 1.80% | 1.91% | 4.34% | 1.29% | 0.49% | 1.29% | 7.67% | 7.67% | 4.68% | 4.68% | | | | 4.51% | 4.92% | 2.81%
Hangzhou | 14.54% | 1.00% | 4.34% | 7.67% | 7.67% | 1.80% | 1.91% | 4.34% | 1.29% | 0.49% | 1.29% | 3.64% | 1.00% | 7.67% | 14.54% | 4.68% | 4.68% | | | 4.34% | 4.86% | 2.95%
Guangzhou | 7.67% | 4.34% | 7.67% | 7.67% | 1.80% | 1.80% | 4.34% | 0.49% | 1.29% | 3.64% | 1.00% | 7.67% | 7.67% | 14.54% | 4.68% | | | | | 4.34% | 5.08% | 2.72%
Seoul | 14.54% | 7.67% | 1.00% | 4.34% | 7.67% | 1.80% | 1.91% | 4.34% | 1.29% | 0.49% | 1.29% | 3.64% | 1.00% | 7.67% | 14.54% | 4.68% | | | | 3.99% | 4.87% | 2.78%
LA Gladiators | 1.80% | 7.67% | 1.00% | 4.34% | 0.63% | 1.91% | 0.57% | 0.69% | 4.00% | 4.00% | 1.91% | 1.80% | 0.63% | 1.91% | 1.91% | | | | | 1.91% | 2.32% | 1.24%
Vancouver | 1.80% | 4.34% | 7.67% | 0.63% | 1.80% | 1.91% | 0.57% | 1.80% | 0.69% | 4.00% | 4.00% | 1.91% | 0.57% | 1.80% | 0.63% | 1.91% | 1.91% | | | 1.80% | 2.23% | 1.35%
LA Valiant | 1.80% | 7.67% | 1.00% | 7.67% | 0.63% | 1.91% | 1.80% | 0.57% | 1.80% | 0.69% | 4.00% | 4.00% | 1.91% | 1.80% | 0.63% | 1.91% | 1.91% | | | 1.80% | 2.45% | 1.49%
Dallas | 1.80% | 1.00% | 4.34% | 7.67% | 0.63% | 1.80% | 1.91% | 1.80% | 0.57% | 1.80% | 0.69% | 0.69% | 0.57% | 1.80% | 0.63% | 1.91% | | | | 1.80% | 1.85% | 1.06%
San Francisco | 1.80% | 7.67% | 1.00% | 4.34% | 0.63% | 1.80% | 1.80% | 0.57% | 1.80% | 0.69% | 4.00% | 4.00% | 1.91% | 0.57% | 0.63% | 1.91% | 1.91% | | | 1.80% | 2.18% | 1.32%
Paris | 0.69% | 0.49% | 0.84% | 0.49% | 4.00% | 0.49% | 0.49% | 1.47% | 1.47% | 0.69% | 4.00% | 4.00% | 1.16% | 7.67% | 7.67% | 14.54% | 4.68% | 1.47% | | 1.47% | 3.13% | 2.01%
London | 0.69% | 0.49% | 0.84% | 1.19% | 4.00% | 0.49% | 1.47% | 1.16% | 1.80% | 4.00% | 4.00% | 1.16% | 7.67% | 7.67% | 14.54% | 1.47% | | | | 1.47% | 3.29% | 1.88%
Boston | 0.69% | 0.49% | 0.84% | 0.49% | 1.19% | 4.00% | 4.00% | 1.47% | 1.16% | 1.16% | 1.80% | 4.00% | 1.16% | 7.67% | 14.54% | 4.68% | 1.47% | | | 1.47% | 2.99% | 1.81%
Toronto | 0.69% | 0.49% | 0.84% | 0.49% | 1.19% | 4.00% | 0.49% | 0.49% | 1.47% | 1.47% | 1.80% | 0.69% | 4.00% | 1.16% | 7.67% | 7.67% | 14.54% | 1.47% | | 1.33% | 2.81% | 1.81%
Atlanta | 0.84% | 0.49% | 1.19% | 3.64% | 0.49% | 0.49% | 1.47% | 1.19% | 1.29% | 0.49% | 1.29% | 3.64% | 0.49% | 1.80% | 1.91% | 0.84% | | | | 1.19% | 1.35% | 0.77%
Florida | 1.29% | 0.84% | 0.49% | 1.19% | 3.64% | 3.64% | 1.47% | 1.16% | 1.19% | 0.49% | 1.29% | 3.64% | 0.57% | 0.63% | 1.91% | 0.84% | | | | 1.19% | 1.52% | 0.87%
New York | 0.69% | 0.49% | 0.84% | 0.49% | 1.19% | 4.00% | 0.49% | 0.49% | 1.16% | 1.16% | 1.80% | 0.69% | 0.69% | 1.16% | 7.67% | 14.54% | 4.68% | 1.47% | | 1.16% | 2.43% | 1.56%
Washington | 1.29% | 0.49% | 0.49% | 1.19% | 3.64% | 0.49% | 1.47% | 1.19% | 1.29% | 0.49% | 1.29% | 0.49% | 0.57% | 1.80% | 0.63% | 0.84% | | | | 1.01% | 1.10% | 0.63%
Philadelphia | 1.29% | 0.49% | 0.84% | 0.49% | 1.19% | 3.64% | 0.49% | 0.49% | 1.47% | 1.16% | 1.19% | 1.29% | 0.49% | 1.29% | 0.49% | 0.57% | 1.80% | 0.63% | 0.84% | 1.00% | 1.06% | 0.72%
Houston | 1.29% | 0.49% | 0.84% | 0.49% | 0.49% | 0.49% | 1.16% | 1.19% | 1.29% | 0.49% | 3.64% | 0.49% | 1.80% | 0.63% | 1.91% | 0.84% | | | | 0.84% | 1.10% | 0.63%

[here is the full table in google sheets in case this one is too thicc for you to see all of it](https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1XwSI9CJHTGfDbLAZ5MlISxzp-LtLAn3zJDvdZH8B8og/edit?usp=sharing)

Important discoveries:

* There is a lot of people in Shanghai, with 24.24 million people even if we go for the common estimate of 6% of the population going into college we still have a massive 1.4 million students.
* We can certifiably guarantee that sometime at the end of the season ***someone*** is gonna take a hit because Jesus how many matches are in shanghai.
* Washington will be the second cleanest team in the league. remaining at the bottom. interestingly. Houston is the 15th biggest suppliers but due to scheduling, they can’t hit their own supply often.
* Around the middle of the season is where the chances of finding a dealer are at their lowest.
* By the time Sp9rk1e enters the league Paris goes into the highest chance of dealer streak they have all season, coincidence? yes very much so.
* Washington is such a good clean boi that they only go over 3% chance one time, in Atlanta. For comparison, the dopes Team, Shanghai only dips below 1% once, when they go to Washinton…
* We need OWL to release more complete stats asap because the offseason is kind of boring without them (:

And so with this newly learned material, we can conclusively say that the Shanghai dragons will be your 2020 champions.

————————————–

The **BOSTONIAN APPROVED DRUG USE RANKINGS**

City | Students | Dealer Count | Chance of dealer
————————————————————————-|—————————————————————————–|———————————————————————————|————————————————————————————-
Atlanta | 363902 | 3639 | 3.78%
Paris | 330000 | 3300 | Sad Emoji
London | 400000 | 4000 | 2.92%
Shanghai | 1454400 | 14544 | 2.91%
Boston | 226495 | 2265 | 2.36%
LA Gladiators | 190832 | 1908 | 1.98%
LA Valiant | 190832 | 1908 | 1.98%
Dallas | 179599 | 1796 | 1.87%
Guangzhou | 766800 | 7668 | 1.53%
Washington | 135166 | 1352 | 1.41%
Philadelphia | 129154 | 1292 | 1.34%
Seoul | 434222 | 4342 | 1.30%
Florida | 119017 | 1190 | 1.24%
Chengdu | 468000 | 4680 | 0.94%
Houston | 83712 | 837 | 0.87%
New York | 68943 | 689 | 0.72%
San Francisco | 62589 | 626 | 0.65%
Toronto | 146894 | 1469 | 0.59%
Vancouver | 56778 | 568 | 0.23%
Hangzhou | 100000 | 1000 | 0.20%

Boston is now a top 5 drug user, congrats!

Team Playing | Homestand | Percentage| Chance| Of | Finding | A| Chill | And | Legit | Dealer | Right | There | Sitting | Outside | The | Arena | My | Dude | . | Median Chance overall | Average Chance overall | Chance per game
—|—|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|—-|———|—-
LA Gladiators | 1.87% | 1.53% | 0.20% | 1.30% | 0.65% | 1.98% | 0.23% | 0.72% | 2.92% | 2.92% | 1.98% | 1.87% | 0.65% | 1.98% | 1.98% | | | | | 1.87% | 1.52% | 0.81%
Vancouver | 1.87% | 1.30% | 1.53% | 0.65% | 1.87% | 1.98% | 0.23% | 1.87% | 0.72% | 2.92% | 2.92% | 1.98% | 0.23% | 1.87% | 0.65% | 1.98% | 1.98% | | | 1.87% | 1.56% | 0.95%
LA Valiant | 1.87% | 1.53% | 0.20% | 1.53% | 0.65% | 1.98% | 1.87% | 0.23% | 1.87% | 0.72% | 2.92% | 2.92% | 1.98% | 1.87% | 0.65% | 1.98% | 1.98% | | | 1.87% | 1.57% | 0.96%
San Francisco | 1.87% | 1.53% | 0.20% | 1.30% | 0.65% | 1.87% | 1.87% | 0.23% | 1.87% | 0.72% | 2.92% | 2.92% | 1.98% | 0.23% | 0.65% | 1.98% | 1.98% | | | 1.87% | 1.46% | 0.88%
Shanghai | 2.91% | 1.53% | 0.20% | 1.53% | 1.53% | 1.98% | 1.87% | 1.30% | 1.41% | 1.34% | 3.78% | 0.20% | 1.53% | 2.91% | 0.94% | 0.94% | | | | 1.53% | 1.62% | 0.93%
Guangzhou | 1.53% | 1.30% | 1.53% | 1.53% | 1.87% | 1.87% | 1.30% | 1.41% | 1.34% | 3.78% | 0.20% | 1.53% | 1.53% | 2.91% | 0.94% | | | | | 1.53% | 1.64% | 0.88%
London | 0.72% | 1.41% | 0.87% | 1.24% | 2.92% | 1.41% | 0.59% | 2.36% | 1.87% | 2.92% | 2.92% | 2.36% | 1.53% | 1.53% | 2.91% | 0.59% | | | | 1.53% | 1.76% | 1.01%
Boston | 0.72% | 1.41% | 0.87% | 1.41% | 1.24% | 2.92% | 2.92% | 0.59% | 2.36% | 2.36% | 1.87% | 2.92% | 2.36% | 1.53% | 2.91% | 0.94% | 0.59% | | | 1.53% | 1.76% | 1.07%
Chengdu | 2.91% | 1.53% | 0.20% | 1.30% | 1.53% | 1.53% | 1.87% | 1.98% | 1.30% | 1.34% | 1.41% | 1.34% | 1.53% | 1.53% | 0.94% | 0.94% | | | | 1.47% | 1.45% | 0.83%
Seoul | 2.91% | 1.53% | 0.20% | 1.30% | 1.53% | 1.87% | 1.98% | 1.30% | 1.34% | 1.41% | 1.34% | 3.78% | 0.20% | 1.53% | 2.91% | 0.94% | | | | 1.47% | 1.63% | 0.93%
Dallas | 1.87% | 0.20% | 1.30% | 1.53% | 0.65% | 1.87% | 1.98% | 1.87% | 0.23% | 1.87% | 0.72% | 0.72% | 0.23% | 1.87% | 0.65% | 1.98% | | | | 1.42% | 1.22% | 0.70%
Hangzhou | 2.91% | 0.20% | 1.30% | 1.53% | 1.53% | 1.87% | 1.98% | 1.30% | 1.34% | 1.41% | 1.34% | 3.78% | 0.20% | 1.53% | 2.91% | 0.94% | 0.94% | | | 1.41% | 1.59% | 0.96%
Paris | 0.72% | 1.41% | 0.87% | 1.41% | 2.92% | 1.41% | 1.41% | 0.59% | 0.59% | 0.72% | 2.92% | 2.92% | 2.36% | 1.53% | 1.53% | 2.91% | 0.94% | 0.59% | | 1.41% | 1.54% | 0.99%
Toronto | 0.72% | 1.41% | 0.87% | 1.41% | 1.24% | 2.92% | 1.41% | 1.41% | 0.59% | 0.59% | 1.87% | 0.72% | 2.92% | 2.36% | 1.53% | 1.53% | 2.91% | 0.59% | | 1.41% | 1.50% | 0.96%
Atlanta | 0.87% | 1.41% | 1.24% | 3.78% | 1.41% | 1.41% | 0.59% | 1.24% | 1.34% | 1.41% | 1.34% | 3.78% | 1.41% | 1.87% | 1.98% | 0.87% | | | | 1.41% | 1.62% | 0.93%
New York | 0.72% | 1.41% | 0.87% | 1.41% | 1.24% | 2.92% | 1.41% | 1.41% | 2.36% | 2.36% | 1.87% | 0.72% | 0.72% | 2.36% | 1.53% | 2.91% | 0.94% | 0.59% | | 1.41% | 1.54% | 0.99%
Houston | 1.34% | 1.41% | 0.87% | 1.41% | 1.41% | 1.41% | 2.36% | 1.24% | 1.34% | 1.41% | 3.78% | 1.41% | 1.87% | 0.65% | 1.98% | 0.87% | | | | 1.41% | 1.55% | 0.88%
Philadelphia | 1.34% | 1.41% | 0.87% | 1.41% | 1.24% | 3.78% | 1.41% | 1.41% | 0.59% | 2.36% | 1.24% | 1.34% | 1.41% | 1.34% | 1.41% | 0.23% | 1.87% | 0.65% | 0.87% | 1.38% | 1.38% | 0.94%
Florida | 1.34% | 0.87% | 1.41% | 1.24% | 3.78% | 3.78% | 0.59% | 2.36% | 1.24% | 1.41% | 1.34% | 3.78% | 0.23% | 0.65% | 1.98% | 0.87% | | | | 1.34% | 1.68% | 0.96%
Washington | 1.34% | 1.41% | 1.41% | 1.24% | 3.78% | 1.41% | 0.59% | 1.24% | 1.34% | 1.41% | 1.34% | 1.41% | 0.23% | 1.87% | 0.65% | 0.87% | | | | 1.34% | 1.35% | 0.77%

Oh look at that Boston is still below BOTH LA teams. What a shame.

> *You should never consume any drug without a doctor’s recommendation. Please seek help if you need to, there is no shame in doing so.*

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here